Am i dreaming, or am i really alive?

She’s amazing, she really is…<3

I don’t know why, but I’ve been feeling really depressed.. Its weird because nobody has hurt me more then her, or at all lately, yet i feel this way. What’s missing…

I don’t like when people rush into a relationship or liking someone because there lonely or to get over someone else. If you like a person and the person really likes you, they’d wait until you’re ready to get into a relationship, not rush you or get over you in a few days. So before you say you really want someone, or with they were yours, think about everything in your relationship with the person and then truly ask yourself if you’re ready for a relationship..

I like you. Though I’m afraid that if i tell you now, everything will be ruined. But then after a while, ill give up, you’ll give up if you like me back, and we’ll be back to the beginning again… 

Do i like her anymore? No

Do i want to talk to her? No

Do i want anything to do with her? Not for a WHILE

Do i dislike her? I believe so

Today i hung out with one of my best friends. Although i had to walk all the way there, it was worth the walk. All of my friends are doing sports so i feel as if i’m drifting away from them slowly. I know i’m going to have to get over it, but life is bring without people to be with. So when i hung out with him, we were laughing, dancing, we got a whole dance routine down, and we just had a good time. i could be hard on him a lot, but i do love him like a brother and i want to understand him and hang out with him more. Anyway it was nice, and it taught me to respect my friends and live life like its my last, do things I’ve never done. From here on, i’m going to try my best to get somewhere, even if its just me, even if no ones there to encourage me.

And keep the ones that actually give a shit, close.